


A View of the Self

by OneLetteredWonder



Series: Sanders One Shots [18]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Gen, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Worth Issues, blink and you miss it roceit, break up fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 15:49:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26940139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OneLetteredWonder/pseuds/OneLetteredWonder
Summary: Passion and self esteem, and how the two interact in the end.This is not a happy ending.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit | Janus Sanders
Series: Sanders One Shots [18]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1768828
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	A View of the Self

“I’m not very good at it though,” Virgil says and Roman gasps dramatically. Carefully he slides over and looks over the artwork in Virgil’s lap. He tsks and shakes his head while looking at the drawing.

“It’s amazing love, it comes with practice and you did so well for your first trial.” Roman says and Virgil feels the little butterflies in his stomach at the praise. He shuffles the doodles about nervously.

“I guess so, not as good as you,” He attempts to return the flirting remarks. Roman laughs loudly at that and slings an arm over Virgil’s shoulder.

“And I’ve had practice and done this a million times, the more you do it the better you get,” Roman tells him with gusto. Virgil just laughs softly and shoves him off. He supposes he could practice more but he’d rather be good at something right away than have to deal with an awkward not as good phase. Still he can’t help but compare the way his art looks next to Roman’s even if he knows it’s silly considering Roman has done this, as he said, a million times before.

“Yeah maybe,” He says instead and offers a small smile that Roman returns full force. They spend the rest of the day on the couch, talking and trading stories until the sun comes up and Virgil has never felt happier.

\--

Virgil is flopped next to Roman on the floor of his room. Roman is coloring something with a multitude of supplies that Virgil can’t even name properly. He shuffles closer to watch, mesmerized by the way Roman finds strokes on the page to turn it into a masterpiece, adding more details Virgil didn’t even think where details could be.

“That's so cool,” He says eventually when Roman leans away from the work to scrutinize it. Roman gives him a quick smile and then picks up another tool to add something else to the already impressive art work.

“I wish I could do that.” Virgil says and rests his head on Roman’s shoulder at their awkward angle. Roman makes a soft noise and shifts to accommodate Virgil more into his space.

“You can if you want to, I have the tools if you ever want to try them.” Roman says and Virgil just laughs. He knows there’s no way he could ever do something like that.

“I appreciate the offer but I’m okay just being in awe of your skills I think,” He elbows roman playfully. Roman lets out a very manly noise and certainly not something high pitched that makes Virgil burst into laughter. They roll on the floor until Virgil is breathless from laughing spread out on Roman’s chest comfortably.

\--

“Shit,” Virgil swears and moves the pan away from the stove. In a flash Roman is beside him helping clean up the overflow of the pan as well as keeping the mess from ruining anything else in the immediate vicinity.

“Shit fuck I’m so sorry,” Virgil says as he washes his hands under cool water from the spill. It burns a little but he’s had worse probably. He looks over his shoulder guiltily as Roman slavages what is left in the pan.

“You have nothing to apologize for,” Roman says with a small smile before turning right back to his work. Virgil whines at that.

“But I fucked up your dinner stuff,” He tries to argue. Roman levels him with a deadpan expression.

“It was partially my fault for not warning you that it could do that, okay? Don't worry too much about it,” Roman smiles at him. Virgil whines again.

“But if I had been paying attention it wouldn’t have happened.” Roman rolls his eyes fondly.

“But you didn’t know to pay attention so you can’t take all the blame for it.” Roman moves the pan over safely and turns off the stove. He holds out his hand and Virgil moves his slightly burned one over for Roman to inspect.

“I still feel bad,” He says.

“Don’t," Roman counters and kisses Virgil’s hand gently, taking the pain with it. Virgil flushes and grumbles, trying to keep up his dark aura but it's lost when Roman smiles too handsomely at him and Virgil just wraps him in a hug.

“Dinner will survive I'm just glad you're okay,” Roman says and Virgil hides his smile in Roman’s chest.

\--

Virgil nearly drops the entire thing when he picks it up, only to be saved by Roman diving in to help him at the last second. Together they move the large couch over to make space for the most epic of pillow forts they can construct with as many blankets as they can find.

“Almost fucked that up,” Virigl laughs and Roman laughs as well.

“Nah, we could have fixed it,” He says. Virgil rolls his eyes and nudges him to be annoyingly endearing.

“The point is I would have broken it,” Virgil says and Roman tosses a pillow at his head. Virgil laughs at that and together they pin blankets and sheets over and atop the chairs and couches they have rearranged for this moment. Roman does most of the work as he has a better eye for these things while Virgil helps him pin things down when necessary.

“Good job,” Virgil says.

“You too,” Roman says back. Virgil gives him an unimpressed look.

“I barely did anything,” He says. Roman takes his hands and gives them a gentle squeeze.

“You did enough.” He says honestly. Virgil shakes his head in disbelief knowing he didn’t really help but he supposes Roman can win this one. They hunker down in the mass of pillows they have stolen and waste away the hours with disney movie after movie, enjoying their company and quoting all the movies by heart.

\--

Virgil twists up his nose a little at the suggestion but all in all, rather likes the idea.

“Game night huh?” He says with a smirk. Roman nods and holds out his hand. Together they walk into the common area where the rest are waiting. Logan has the rules open in his lap while Janus and Patton set up the game. Patton waves excitedly when he spies the two of them, cooing over their linked hands. Virgil smiles shyly at the attention and his hand feels warm when Roman lets go to sit down. He ignores when Janus gives him and Roman a scrutinizing look in favor of talking about pretend strategies for the game.

“And if you’re clever enough you can take two!” Patton says in the middle of Logan muttering about the rules. Virgil snorts.

“Okay so there’s no way I’ll be able to do that,” He says. Patton gasps and Roman bumps him to get his attention.

“Don’t say that, I'm sure you’ll figure out a way,” Roman winks and Virgil hides in his hood for a good minute at the blunt display of affection. He misses the way Remus pretend gags and Janus rolls his eyes.

“It’ll be fun anyway!” Patton says to steal the attention once again. In the end Virgil doesn’t manage to do the trick but he cheers softly when Roman does right after Janus manages to figure it out.

\--

They are all sitting in the common area, doing their own thing when Roman and Remus come back from their adventure, dirty and in Remus’s case covered in something weird. Virgil smiles when they enter and Roman gives him a quick one back.

“Have fun?” Patton asks all kinds of excited to hear about their adventures. Roman and Remus talk over each other recalling the tale of how Remus was a mind controlling zombie master necromancer lich and Roman was the dashing incorruptible hero with a heart of gold and the two burst into laughter at their own retelling and it’s inaccuracies. Patton giggles along and asks them more questions to keep them talking.

“Next time though, don’t stab me,” Remus says and lifts up his shirt to expose a large gash near his stomach. Patton’s jaw drops at the marking.

“I did not stab you that hard!” Roman attempts to defend himself but they both know Remus likes the look of the scar and will probably let his wound bleed for days just because he can.

“You gotta warn me next time so I can make a dramatic exit of this mortal coil,” Remus says and tosses himself back to fall splat on the ground with a sick squelch noise. Roman kicks him.

“I shall not and you know it.” He says.

“Drama queens,” Janus hisses but kindly.

“I would never be able to do what you guys do,” Virgil chimes in. Roman gives him a soft look.

“Virgil,” He chides softly. Virgil just shrugs.

“We could always teach you!” Remus calls from the ground where he began to sink in like acid boiling around him. Virgil shakes his head.

“Nah I’d just mess you up, I'll stick to hearing about it after.” He says. Roman shakes his head but smiles gently and Virgil returns the look happily. They continue to tell about their adventure out and Virgil is content to watch Roman look so alive while he does.

\--

“I could never get it right,” Virgil says with a scoff, putting down the pad of paper on his lap along with the tools Roman provided to him.

“Oh no none of that,” Roman says and is in his space immediately. Virgil blinks dumbly at Roman so close to him and feels his heart pound in his chest.

“You’re amazing Virge, and you can do this, and get better, it just takes time,” Roman tells him earnestly. Virgil swallows hard and looks down.

“Thank you, but it’s still not that good.” Roman sighs softly.

“But it can be good, you just have to let it.” He says. Virgil shrugs half heartedly, kind of getting the point. He doesn’t focus much on the art after that, too preoccupied with how nice it felt having Roman that close to him.

\--

“This movie sucks!” Remus says and throws his m&m popcorn at the screen, leaving small trails of chocolate in the wake as it slides down the screen. With a wave of his hand Logan makes the chocolate lines disappear and gives Remus a scolding look that Remus decidedly ignores.

“I don’t know, I kind of like it,” Virgil says from his leaning spot on Roman’s arm. Roman shrugs to either of them.

“I think the creatures are cute!” Patton says and flaps the paws of his onesie. The movie may not be the most interesting but Virgil finds it decent, just enough to like at least.

“I want the lizard to eat someone, like actually eat them, like the knight dude,” Remus says.

“Gross,” Roman says.

“Not any more than the knight,” Janus says snippily and Roman snorts at that, jostling Virgil enough to shift his position and curl closer. Roman tenses for a second then relaxes into the touch and Virgil is content. Patton coos over them a little which makes them both feel awkward but for Virgil not in an unwelcome way.

\--

Virgil is hanging out with Patton, half listening to music and half listening to Patton prattle on about his day when Roman and Janus come into the common space. Roman is waving his hands about excitedly like he does when he’s very into what he’s saying and Janus is just letting him talk with a small smile.

“What are you talking about?” Virgil asks. Roman stutters to a stop but bounces back quick.

“Oh just the paintings I’ve been working on,” Roman says with a wave of his hand.

“The ones we worked on together?” Virgil asks and sits up to lean closer and be more involved in the conversation. Roman nods and beams over at Janus.

“I could show you them if you like?” He asks and before Janus can say anything Virgil pipes up.

“You should show them, they’re way better than mine.” He snorts to himself and Patton gasps hard.

“Oh no kiddo that’s not how this works. I’m sure you worked real hard on your paintings too!” Patton flops over and latches Virgil in a tight hug. Virgil barely returns it but the conversation is lost to something else as Patton steals Virgil's attention and Roman and Janus walk away.

\--

It’s another movie night. This time some fantasy thing with swords and damsels in distress and a storybook passed down through generations. Logan is sitting in his chair with the book in question on his lap, preferring to read along than watch the movie itself. Patton and Remus are on the floor a weird mess of limbs that they both swear is comfortable. Virgil is also on the floor but he's leaning up against Roman’s legs as he sits on the couch next to Janus.

“I could do that,” Roman says after a fancy foot work and sword sequences. Remus makes some sort of noise that doesn’t exactly sound human but Roman tells him to shut up anyway.

“Could you now,” Janus says mildlyteasing. Roman hums proudly and Virgil watches his head tilt side to side in thought.

“I think so, it might take a few tries but I could manage something at least close,” His eyes dance over the screen and then around, replaying the scene over and over in his head.

“I believe you can do it,” Virgil say encouragingly. Roman gives him a small smile.

“If you can do the hero’s part, I’ll attempt the bandit’s.” Janus says casually. Roman beams at him though.

“Could you imagine if we could pull that off?” He gushes, talking over the movie as to ways they could pull off such a trick. Virgil watches Roman talk instead of the movie, loving the way he gets excited and swings his hands about.

“I bet you could, fuck knows I don't have the dexterity for it,” Virgil says. Roman whines and gives him a sad smile.

“Virge,” He says softly. Virgil just shrugs it off with a smirk. He knows where his skills lie and that he would never be able to attempt something like that, but Roman can, and he can encourage him from the sidelines.

\--

“Absolutely not,” Logan says. Remus lets out a petulant noise that makes Virgil snort into his hand while Patton giggles unashamed. 

“Come ooon, it’s just a small hip roll?” Remus tries again to goad Logan into dancing with him, a dance that is certainly out of Logan’s area of expertise. Still that doesn’t stop Remus from trying. Remus almost has Logan dropping low when Roman and Janus find them, swords over their shoulders.

“What the hell are you doing?” Janus asks and before anyone can answer, raises his hand to stop anyone from saying anything.

“I changed my mind don't tell me,” He says and Roman snickers.

“Where you two headed?” Patton asks, summoning a bowl of cookie dough and a spoon. He feeds Remus a bite from his spoon before Remus can dig his fingers into it, they both ignore Logan's health chiding.

“To the mind theater, see if we can do that choreography from the movie,” Roman smiles over at Janus who raises his eyebrows challengingly in response. Patton coos over the idea and Remus mildly begs them both to actually stab each other and take pictures of the blood for him. Virgil shakes his head.

“I could never do that so you two have fun,” He says with a two fingered salute. Roman inhales slowly then plasters on a smile.

“Yeah, see you later,” He says, and sounds much happier walking away with Janus. Virgil watches him go and thinks nothing of it, eating a bite of cookie dough as Remus finally gives in, and tackles Logan to the ground instead.

\--

“I don't know, I've never done anything like this before.” Virgil says. Patton gives him a pout and crosses his arms, trying to convince Virgil to try the game by sheer look alone.

“I'll probably be bad at it,” He says.

“You don't know until you try,” Roman chimes in from behind him. Virgil turns to give him a disbelieving smile.

“Come on you know I'm not good at this stuff,” He says and turns back around before Roman can respond, so Virgil misses the look on his face. Patton spends a few more minutes trying to convince Virgil to play and only does so with much effort to the point Virgil almost feels like crying for a second with how frustrated he gets. Patton cheers and hugs him when he does though so that has to be good for something.

"Seen I knew you could do it!" Patton smiles brightly and wraps Virgil in a hug that Virgil barely returns, unsure of if he really deserves the affection from his pathetic attempt at playing.

“Wait where did Janus go?” Remus asks then. They all turn to the open spot next to Roman then. Roman sighs lowly.

“Well, Janus represents self preservation. Hearing all the negative self talk he just- “ And Roman snaps to make the rest of his point. The other’s make a collective ‘oh’ noise and no one questions how Roman knows this. Virgil shrugs it off and is just happy the conversation passes to something else and off of him. Too much attention drives him crazy.

\--

Roman is cooking when Virgil walks into the kitchen. Pans and pots boiling, all working simultaneously to make dinner for the night. Virgil watches for a minute then steps closer. He places an arm on Roman’s shoulder and Roman jumps in surprise.

“Shit sorry,” Virgil says right away. Roman lets out a huff of air and returns to looking at the food before him.

“It's okay, what's up?” He says evenly. Virgil smiles gently at him.

“Nothing, just wanted to check on you.” He says. Roman gives him a quick smile.

“I’m alright.” He says. Virgil gives him a short hug and walks off, happy to have gotten to see Roman working again. Lately Virgil’s been hanging out with Patton and Remus a lot and he misses his time with Roman considering how close they used to be. But they still spend time all together as a group and it's nice being able to be close to Roman then. So he thinks nothing of the time and goes to his room to listen to music. With the notes playing loud in his head, he can't hear Roman laughing with someone else in the kitchen.

\--

Roman helps Patton carry over the plates for breakfast and Virgil yawns. He hasn’t actually gone to sleep yet and if Patton finds out he’ll get chided so he’ll keep it a secret for as long as he possibly can. He doesn’t know how long that’ll last with Roman there who knows his sleep pattern, and Janus who can pick up on lies but he’ll certainly try.

“So what is the plan for today?” Patton asks after a few bites of breakfast. Roman hums in thought.

“I have some work things to do later, perhaps some planning for videos that I need to do with Remus. Maybe.” He tacks on just in case. Virgil snorts knowing how Roman sometimes feels about his brother.

“I shall be working on my skin care, I’m due to shed soon,” Janus says. Patton then turns to him. Virgil shrugs.

“Not sure, probably lay around like the useless spawn I am,” And Virgil laughs but he’s the only one.

“Oh my god,” Roman puts his head in his hands and Virgil laughs louder at that thinking Roman is laughing with him.

“Now kiddo come on! There’s gotta be something you can do today?” Patton does his best he really does, but Virgil knows he's not going to be doing much, probably just listening to music and getting a new high score in word crush.

“Nah just lazy regular me,” He says. Patton pouts and starts rattling off things he can do and how well he knows Virgil is going to do at those things regardless of if Virgil has ever tried any of those things in the first place. Virgil laughs and shrugs off those ideas, turning to smile at Roman. The smile slips off as he watches Roman walk away with Janus's breakfast in his hands. 

He didn’t even notice Janus slip away. He shrugs at the thought, thinking how nice it is that Roman is willing to bring him his food. He doesn't notice that Roman took his own food with him, and is too distracted with Patton, and then Logan and Remus, to realize Roman doesn’t return to the table.

\--

“I really can’t," Virgil says. Roman sighs and Virgil leans close to him.

“Hey you okay?” He asks. Roman nods with a strained smile.

“Yeah fine, just tired I think.” He says. Virgil sits up and pulls Roman’s blanket over him.

“You should sleep then” He says. Roman raises a single eyebrow at him.

“You should too, I know you haven't slept,” Roman says. Virgil rolls his eyes fondly.

“I will, I will, you know I'm bad at keeping a schedule though ” He smirks and Roman sighs again. Virgil leans down to nuzzle their heads together and then sinks out. He had no idea Roman was so tired. It’s a good thing he’s leaving to let him get rest instead of annoying him later into the night. Hopefully Roman will be well rested tomorrow and maybe they can spend the day together. Of course Virgil isn't going to sleep yet though. He knows he won’t soon so might as well stay awake.

\--

Virgil blinks dumbly at Janus and Roman on the couch, both talking softly but excitedly over something. It’s rare Roman talks quietly about something, only happening on rare occasions. Virgil has only seen it happen once or twice and he’s aching to know what they're talking about.

“What’s going on?” He asks casually and leans over the back of the couch to see what they’re looking at. It’s a video on Roman’s phone, the long end of hard work on the screen in the form of the sword art he and Janus worked on. Roman angles his phone so he can see and eventually the crowd draws and Patton and Logan are looking too.

“Impressive stance,” Logan says and Janus turns to look at him.

“You notice the stance and not the practical effects of fake blood all over the stage floor?” He asks sarcastically. Logan bristles and takes off his glasses to clean on a cloth, grumbling about how the stance was good though.

“Aw you guys it’s amazing!” Patton says with his jaw dropped in a wide smile. Virgil feels an inkling of pride in the way Roman preens under the compliments.

“It looks really good you guys,” Virgil says and his stomach flips when Roman gives him one of those lovely small smiles.

“It’s really impressive, there’s no way I could do that.” He says and looks back down at the video, missing the way Roman’s smile falls. Patton nudges him.

“Don't say that, I'm sure you could if you tried! Roman would probably teach you,” Patton says with an over done wink and nudge. It makes Vigil laugh awkwardly but happily that Patton remembers they’re close. Roman doesn’t say anything.

\--

“Need any help?” Virgil asks upon entering the kitchen.

“Nope,” Roman says plainly and Virgil stops short not expecting that.

“Oh,” He says then and there’s an awkward bubble that fills the space between them.

“Uh what are you making?” He asks to fill the silence but the lack of sound has inklings of anxiety prickling across his skin.

“Chicken parm,” Comes Roman’s simple reply. Virgil nods.

“Sounds good.” He says and Roman continues to work. Virgil watches for a moment and jumps when Janus enters the kitchen.

“Roman just wanted you to know I finished the sword you wanted,” Janus says and Roman whips around with stars in his eyes. Virgil leans back and watches Roman be excited.

“You did?” He asks incredulously. Janus nods and brings out the sword, finely crafted and thin. Roman takes it quick and levels it on his hand.

“It’s perfect. Thank you so much.” Roman is beaming. Janus smiles quick and walks off. Virgil is too busy looking at Roman to notice that Janus says nothing to him.

“I didn’t know Janus was making you a sword,” He says as a conversation starter. Roman smiles up at him and Virgil feels that lovely fluttering in his stomach at seeing that look on Roman’s face.

“Yeah he said he’s been doing it for a while and that it would be no trouble so he made me one with my specifications in mind,” Roman swirls the sword around a few more times then drops it out of existence, most likely his armoury back in his room.

“I think it’s super cool you have someone you can finally do fancy sword stuff with,” Virgil says honestly and Roman smiles down at his hands, going back to preparing the food with vigor.

“Cause fuck we both knew I wasn’t good enough to do it,” Virgil laughs and becomes painfully aware that Roman doesn’t laugh with him.

“Yeah it’s been nice. Hey I’ll talk to you after dinner yeah?” Roman says with a tight lipped expression.

“Oh yeah, shit sorry for being in the way,” Virgil smiles crookedly and Roman waves as he walks away. Virgil takes a deep breath and calms himself down. The anxiety from earlier lingers but it can be pushed away for now.

\--

Virgil is helping Patton set the table for an odd ended lunch when Roman comes barreling in happily. Virgil finds himself smiling at him and before he can ask why Roman is so peppy, Roman speaks.

“Hey Pat can you pack some to go? Me and Janus are going painting in the imagination.” Roman says and something shatters in Virgil’s chest.

“Oh of course!” Patton cheers and sets about doing so. Virgil has to very mindfully put down the plates in his hands.

“You guys are going painting?” He asks smally and Roman blinks at him.

“Yeah, he’s done some art before and it’s something we have in common so why not?” Roman smiles then and Virgil can’t find it in him to return the gestures.

“I thought that was like, our thing?” Virgil questions. Roman shifts awkwardly.

“Well you never seemed like you liked doing it,” Roman says and Virgil shoves his hands in his hoodie pockets. Patton is still preparing to go boxes in the kitchen and whether or not he hears Virgil isn’t sure.

“I did like it even if I wasn't very good.” Virgil says and bites the inside of his lip. Roman rubs the back of his head with an expression Virgil can’t decipher.

“You never tried to get better,” Roman says. Virgil feels like ice water was thrown down his spine.

“I did though.” He says.

“Did you?” Roman asks and Virgil isn’t sure if he’s grateful or upset Patton comes over and hands off a basket of goodies to Roman. Roman takes it with a quick smile and walks off, not sparing a second glance to Virgil.

\--

“Can we talk?” Virgil asks. Roman looks up from his desk and smiles gently.

“Sure whats up?” He asks and Virgil enters Roman’s room and closes the door behind him. He takes a deep breath but it does nothing to settle his frazzled nerves.

“Are we good?” Virgil asks openly. Roman blinks at him and lets out a small chuckle.

“Yeah? Why are you asking?” Roman says then. Virgil shifts from foot to foot.

“I don’t know I’ve just felt weird the past few days and I wanted to make sure.” Roman rolls his eyes with that fond smile and Virgil can feel it easing the tension in his stomach.

“We’re good,” Roman confirms and Virgil steps forward to wrap Roman in a hug quick. He waves as he leaves and there’s a good feeling in him that he’s okay with staying for now.

\--

“Can you stop?” Roman snaps and Virgil freezes. The entire common area doesn’t move. Virgil swallows hard at the lump in his throat.

“Stop.. what?” He asks. He thought he was just playing the game Patton asked him to. Roman lets out a harsh sigh.

“You’re self deprecating, again.” Roman says. Virgil flinches back and looks at Patton and Logan, and even Remus, trying to figure out if he heard that right.

“I.. yeah?” Virgil says and Roman gives him an unimpressed look.

“It’s true though,” Virigl shrugs and Roman rolls his eyes and not fondly. Silence rings loud and Virgil can feel the want and urge to run building inside him.

“I’m. I just. Sorry.” He offers and that must have been the wrong thing to say cause Roman stands sharply.

“I don't want you to be sorry, not to me.” Roman says. Virgil looks around for help but the others are just staring unsure of what to do.

“The only person you need to be sorry to is the one in the mirror. Do you know how hard it is? Listening to you talk bad about yourself all the time? Virgil you don’t try.” Roman rants. Virgil looks down and rubs at his arms, he wants to run away.

“I do try. It’s just. It's hard.” He manages to say but it’s over powered by the way Roman scoffs.

“No you don't. You don't try. You think it's immediately being good at something and not baby steps and you just. You dont.” Roman goes on and there’s nothing Virgil would love more than for the ground to open up and swallow him whole. The silence follows Roman’s words. Virgil wants to say something, the word sorry is on the tip of his tongue. It doesn’t matter as Roman turns and walks away from him without another word.

\--

“Hey,” Virgil says.

“What.” Roman says. Virgil winces.

“I just. I don't know. I wanted to say so-”

“Don’t.” Roman interrupts. Virgil looks down at his feet. 

“I liked you so much,” Roman says when Virgil doesn’t say anything. Virgil lifts his head slowly to see Roman nearly crying as well.

“Do you know how much it sucks to hear the person you like be talked about so badly? Virgil if I talked to myself the way you do about yourself,” Here Roman scoffs with a bitter smile. Virgil can barely breathe.

“If I said the things you’ve said, about myself, you’d get so mad at me, you’d be such a hypocrite.” Roman shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair. Virgil wonders how long this has been happening without him aware of it, wonders what else he’s been missing.

“I like you but, why would I buy anything you're selling when you advertise it the way you have?” Roman asks then and his voice cracks. Virgil feels tears running down his cheeks before he can register them.

“Are you breaking up with me?” He asks.

“We were never together.” Roman snaps. Virgil inhales shakily and it seems all his biggest fears about not being good enough are real.

“Right,” He says and sinks out. Roman lets him.

**Author's Note:**

> Hm.


End file.
